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 Tom says...
Time flies, and time management is one of my worst skills—it’s a deadly cocktail, especially when you have an editor waiting and you’re past deadline.
So, as I lay in bed early today, the morning after daylight-savings, I had a brilliant idea: We haven’t set the clocks back yet, so if I get up right now, and write this article, it can be done in no time at all. I mean, literally, no time, since, when I finish, I can turn the clocks back an hour, and be right back where I started.
Time would not only stop flying, it would actually stop! An historic moment in the annals of time-management.
I did get right up from bed. I grabbed a cup of coffee. (It’s already made, since my wife, Special K, the queen of time management, pre-set the timer for it last night.) I’m not quite sure how she lives with me, but that’s for another piece.
First thing I do is go straight to e-mails, instead of starting to write, because that’s what we do now. You do nothing before checking e-mails. Why? I have no idea, but I’m sure not getting anything written while I’m reading them. Okay, focus. I open up the writing tool on my laptop, which is never a time saver, since no one seems to be able to open the ancient program I send this article in. Last month I saw three tech support people hovering over it for an hour. Now, that was a waste of time, but when I offered to just type it out on a sheet of paper and hand it in, the look of horror on their faces, at the mere mention of such an archaic approach, told me that this is no longer socially acceptable. After all, if I do it on the computer, it will save time.
There are just so many gadgets and gizmos out there professing to save us time. You can even take courses on how to manage your time, hire consultants to teach you, or buy books about it. But that all seems pretty time-consuming to me.
It’s clear that I don’t have the answers for anything technological, since I was one of the first to declare that texting on cell phones would never catch on. Why fight with our fat little fingers to write something on a phone, when the purpose of the instrument is to call people and talk to them? Wrong again.
I’m not saying I’m against progress, but I did hold on to my old cell phone for so long that the company finally sent a tech swat team rappelling into my office to confiscate it. They left a new model, which I still haven’t figured out how to use.
Then, when I tried to order a battery for my laptop last week, I was told that it’s from 2002, and therefore no longer in stock. It’s taken me five years to figure out how to use this time-saving device. Please don’t make me get a new one now!
Well it seems as if my time is up here. Now I’m off to turn all the clocks back. Wait a minute, all of these clocks are electronic—the microwave, the stove, the alarm clocks, even the wall clocks. Now I’ve got to go look for the manuals. This is going to take some time.
Joe says...
Here we are in the second last month of the year. I can’t believe how fast time has raced by. Soon we’ll be ringing in a new year. New Year’s Eve, now that’s one day of the year you never forget about or as I like to say, “fuhgeddabout.” But the rest of the year’s special events can be a tricky thing to memorize. Birthdays, anniversaries, your kids’ dance recitals or hockey games, Christmas parties—remembering it all puts a lot of pressure on a guy.
Since we like to keep it simple, one way to remember a seemingly unending list of annual events is by tying them to a memorable sporting event. Thank God for the marketing geniuses in sports!
March—If you say March to a sports fan, he will immediately think March Mad-ness. College basketball championships take over the TV in March, offering some of the most exciting basketball action of the year. Plus, they keep it so simple to follow the brackets: “Sweet 16,” “Elite 8,” “Final Four.”
October—October is known for Major League Baseball’s “Fall Classic.” The legendary Reggie Jackson was even nicknamed Mr. October, not for posing in a calendar, but because of his unbelievable playoff accomplishments.
November—“This will be a November to Remember!” is one of the most used lines in sports. You’ll see it in ads and hear it from sports announcers all over this country. Males like things in black and white terms. The only time we get into the grey area is for November’s Grey Cup.
Now that we have the months down, as men it would be nice if we could figure out what day it is! I know that would make the ladies happy. |
