Five Ferocious Felonies

The Bee Act

 Yes, those little stingers that frighten children, and give us a whole new way to look at Jerry Seinfeld, have a whole set of laws just for themselves.

Mandates as part of the Bee Act go into some areas that one might expect for a cat or dog owner, except that they go far and beyond licensing a “pet.” For example, section 2(1) states that, “no person shall be in possession of bees or beekeeping equipment unless he is registered under this Act as a beekeeper.”

That would be the same thing as needing to register as a dog owner if you had a doghouse but no Fido. Of course, the question that must then be asked is why anyone would have beekeeping gear without… you know… having bees. But who are we to pry into your personal life?

The Noxious Weeds Act

 From one allergen to another, we now look at the Noxious Weeds Act. In part, the Act states, in section 2, that “The Lieutenant Governor in Council may, for any part or all of the province, by regulation, declare any plant not included in the Schedule to be a noxious weed.”

What does that mean? Well, look at section 3(1), which states that landowners or landlords, “shall destroy all noxious weeds and noxious weed seeds growing or located on the land as often as may be necessary to prevent the growth, ripening and scattering of weeds or weed seeds.”

So if you look at this law alone, plants on the schedule, including absinth and hemp (both the regular and Indian variety) are free to be grown here in Manitoba. We wonder if dandelions too are protected.

The Marriage Act

 Remember the campaign during the 2001 Census to make Jedi an official religion in Canada? Well young Padawan, your wish may come true in Manitoba.

If you read The Marriage Act, you will see that in section 1, a religious denomination is defined as, “an organized society, association, or body of religious believers or worshippers consisting of not less than 25 persons professing to believe in the same religious doctrines, dogma, or creed and closely associated or organized for religious worship or discipline or both.”

It looks like Han Solo and Princess Leia can safely settle into their new life together in Transcona. Get engaged you must.

The Boxing Commission Act

Believe it or not, boxing is the only law to have a full Act in Manitoba’s law books. This series of legislations mandates everything to do with the “sweet science,” including licensing, event permits and gate receipts. Standard fare, right?
What is interesting to note about the law is the number of sports that fall under the realm of pugilism. Section 31(1.1) denotes that, “A regulation may be made under clause (1)(p) to define “boxing” as including kick-boxing, full contact martial arts or any similar sport.”

Even more oddly, this clause clearly maps out that wrestling (i.e. professional wrestling) is not regulated by the commission. Some may be surprised to know that up until 1996, pro wrestling was part of this Act, while others may be surprised that boxing itself is not fake.

The Heritage Resources Act

No one in or outside the city of Winnipeg or the province of Manitoba will argue that our rich history has to be protected. So many artifacts are held in such high regard in our city. It is for this reason that the Heritage Resources Act makes this list. If you look at Regulation 160/89, the list or “schedule” of items deemed to be “heritage objects,” you will see why. The objects in question are:
· Skippy L Riverboat; and
· Timothy Eaton Statue.

Yes, just two items. An even amount that appears as odd, in Manitoba law.